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10:00 pm
3/19/06

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[info]soylentgreen554
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Alone in this house again tonight
I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine
There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me
The way that it was and could have been surrounds me
I'll never get over you walkin' away

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

Would it help if I turned a sad song on
"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone
Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters
It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better
But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way
-----------------

She...went home. I feel alone, I feel hurt. I feel terrible.
I want her. I want her in more than just that...sensual, urging sort of way. I want to hold her. To tell her that I love her and hear the words returned. God...I miss her.

-Loki
Current Mood:
 depressed depressed
Current Music:
 Candleburn // Dishwalla
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08:12 pm
3/3/06

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never see me cry
[info]soylentgreen554
I really shouldn't let myself get this way...
I try to laugh about it (Entertainment is a sin.)
cover it all up with lies (Like saying that I'm happy.)
i try to laugh about it (I should be thrown in jail)
hiding the tears in my eyes (Turn away so you don't see them.)

cuz boys don't cry (Or at least they really shouldn't.)
boys don't cry (At least I really shouldn't.)

---------------------

Is it possible to both hate and love life at the same time? To have something that's tearing you up about something that makes you happy?

What's eating me: I can't live with my fiancee till I'm 20. Maybe 19.
Why this has to do with anything that even remotely makes me happy: It's becuase I'm going to a college that I've looked at since one of my friends started going there back when I was a sophomore.
What I hate: I made my beloved cry. She says it's not my fault, but god...I feel like it is.

Current Mood:
 angry angry
Current Music:
 Boys Don't Cry // Oleander
* * *
02:17 pm
3/2/06

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[info]soylentgreen554
I CAN'T FEEL MY FACE
Got all but the last of my cavities done today. Ima keel the dentist, even though he's so nice to me. *sighs* My handsome face is all swollen, and my head hurts. I can't think very straight (not that I think straight to begin with, you know?) and I'm feeling nausous to top it all off.
And I can't speak properly. Like, seriously. I can't even smile. Stupid lydicaine froze my muscles. *growls at it* <--- *tries to growl, anyhow*

I'm going to go hide in my dungeon of floating candles now, kthx. And play with my lifesize Megami Christine doll.
I wish I had a Meg-doll. Although that'd be MUY creepy. Muy.

-L

Current Mood:
 gloomy gloomy
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11:14 am
2/28/06

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[info]soylentgreen554
I feel like Kakashi...
Now I know how Kakashi feels. XD I've got this uke swezzer that's all "Sup, face?" at me.
Uke swezzer: term coined by Meg, meaning a sweater with a giant neck, in some size that's huge on you. You can practically hide in these things. With a tent, cooking supplies and a sink in there with you. XD

I was trying to eat a poptart, and I literally had to pull down the collar of my swezzer, like Kakashi does with his mask. HAAA KAKASHI.

....I'm so medicated.

-Loki

Current Mood:
 high high
Current Music:
 FISHES~!
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03:32 pm
2/27/06

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[info]soylentgreen554
Other Accounts
[info]rock_lee_554 This is my open account, that LOTS of people have the username to.
[info]soylentgreen554 My closed account that a limited number of people have access to. Also my writing account.
[info]king_jas An account for the comic that I'm running.
* * *
09:29 pm
2/26/06

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It&#39;s not abuse
[info]soylentgreen554
I'm bitter.
It's time to wake up Peter,
Put away the fairytale
The clock is striking midnight,
Can't you hear?
Not all tales have happy endings,
We can't keep pretending
'Cause there's no such thing as heroes that are queer

I'm never going to be someone's hero. I just realized that.

( FUCK. )

Ha. Beware the senseless, pointless and baselessly self-centered angst. I fully admit that I'm being a little brat and that I'm completely full of myself. So don't you fsking dare tell me that I'm being a pity whore. Pity whores don't admit that they're angsting, AND they don't clearly state that they know they're being self-centered.
Loki

Current Music:
 Best Kept Secret // BARE
* * *
07:01 am
2/21/06

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[info]soylentgreen554
Way too early for angst. =_=
It's way, way, WAY to early to have angst. Yet, I somehow have managed to acquire it. Woke up, rolled over and found myself groping about the bed for my mate...I couldn't find her there.
I hate it that she had to leave. I HATE it.
One of my earrings came out in the night- I might need to pierce it again once it's healed, since it's decided "Lets be infected~!"
I'm wearing my cloak, prince-garb and my tail to school. Fuck anyone who says I'm strange. I'm already the weirdo of the school- I might as well have fun with it, yanno?
I miss Meg. Immensely. So, SO immensely. I think I may have tried to hump my pillow (or my tail) in the night. My tail, 'cuase I woke up attached to it several times (I fell asleep in my clothes 'cause I just kinda passed out around two or three.)...

I want to go to Belmont.

.....and I've discovered that I'm a snow leopard that hates the cold. Especially when I can't feel my fingers for typing.

-L
Tags: ,
Current Mood:
 tired tired
Current Music:
 None- too early, and would thusly wake the madre
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08:57 pm
2/20/06

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dream of heaven
[info]soylentgreen554
Oiroke no what?! - chapter one
( Oiroke no jutsu wa NANI desu~!? )
Current Mood:
 horny horny
Current Music:
 I should be sleeping // some country guy
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12:40 pm
2/16/06

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dream of heaven
[info]soylentgreen554
Awaiting my beloved
I'm waiting. And waiting and waiting and waiting. There's still six hours and four minutes left as of writing this sentence till I get to see her.
Six hours and three minutes.
Two minutes.
One minute.

I miss her so much...it's odd, but the closer it gets to the time for her to arrive, the more I miss her. Absence makes the heart long, it makes it ache and yearn and want.
Being in the presence of a person make it lust and love and want nothing but to feel them in your arms.

( Read more... )

-L

Current Mood:
 anxious anxious
* * *
09:36 am
2/13/06

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[info]soylentgreen554
Mephistopheles' Return
People argue, and it's a terrible thing. Lovers make themselves sick with needing the acceptance of thier partner, and I find myself the mediator of a fight, the messenger that usually gets shot in the head. Mercilessly.

( I... )

On a different note, Beethoven's Last Night is amazing. I have such love in my heart for the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Thier music is amazing, thier songs are GREAT and the story works perfectly.

I envy thier perfection.

-L

Current Mood:
 aggravated aggravated
Current Music:
 I'll Keep Your Secrets // Trans-Siberian Orchestra
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